How to Write a Wedding Speech

So, you’ve been asked to speak at a wedding. That’s no small part. You’re obviously super close to the newlyweds, maybe part of the couple’s inner circle, a long-term bestie or a relative. Whatever it is in your case, you’re someone they trust to help set the tone of their big day and help hold their dream atmosphere. But now comes the tricky part: what exactly do you say? Do you deliver cheek or charm or something in between? How do you find that perfect balance of humour and sentiment?

Crafting a wedding speech involves a deep dive into the history of the couple’s relationship. Like a comedian turned historian, you’re tasked with entertaining the wedding venue while sharing special anecdotes of the beautiful and more vulnerable parts between you and the couple. The prep stage of wedding speech writing also involves how wedding speeches tend to differ for the best man, maid of honour, a parent or simply a close friend and knowing where you will fit in the order of events. The key is knowing how to mix sincerity with just the right amount of personality.

This guide will walk you through everything you need to know about how to write a wedding speech, from what to include and how to deliver to best man speech tips and help with delivery, so you can step up to the mic with confidence and give a speech that’s every bit as memorable as the day itself.

How to Write a Wedding Speech: Step-by-Step

Creating a wedding speech is one of the toughest writing tasks. You have to dive through memories, find the humour, discern what is and isn’t appropriate and then consider how it will all be received by a large audience, many of whom you may not have ever met. We get it, and props to you for accepting the challenge. To help make the whole process smoother for you and reduce the stress, break it down into these steps:

Brainstorm an Engaging Opening

There will be time for sentiments and warmth. But your opening is the time to really get the audience on board and make the rest of the speech a smooth and lighthearted journey. While prepping your wedding speech, sit down and spend some time brainstorming a great opening. You can completely avoid introducing yourself in the opening, unless you have a humorous way to do so, because this can really come at any time. Instead, opt for something more fun and creative, like an audience poll where they raise their hand or make reference to an obvious joke that everyone can join in on.

Say it with a Story

After an opening, or even as your opening, tell a story. Stories help to give the whole wedding reception a feeling of the time and place you’re speaking about, and they can make it much easier for you to relay your message and feeling towards a couple of friends. For example, instead of saying something like “Steve absolutely cherishes Angie”, tell a story of how he couldn’t stop talking about her when they first started dating, or how he grew calmer and more peaceful since they joined forces in life. Tidbits like these say it more clearly and powerfully than stating a fact ever could.

When selecting a story to share, make sure to steer clear of any that involve ex-partners, anything negative about the newlyweds or things that are inappropriate for a wide, old and young audience. Instead, swap these out for a special moment or a fun memory you share with the couple. Then dive into why it was special, how it felt being with them and then lead this into what makes them such a great couple.

Wish the Couple Well

After all, the traditional purpose of wedding speeches was to wish well upon the newlyweds. Make sure to include a well-wish for the couple as well as both people in the couple in your remarks. If you need some help, think of the best life you could hope for the couple, and speak it into existence via your speech.

Top it off with a Toast

After stories are shared, memories are honoured, wishes are given and you’ve honoured the couple in your unique way, to it all off with a toast for everyone to join in on.  Make it short, sweet and celebratory – something simple but effective, like “Please join me in raising a glass to the happy couple. Cheers to Greg and James, and best wishes for a lifetime of light and laughter!”. Then, raise your glass and head in for a hug, which also makes for a great moment (and photo op!) to finish off a great speech.

Run Through Rehearsals as much as You Need

Part of speech writing is jotting it down; the other is finessing the flow. To see if your speech flows easily and doesn’t sound clunky or forced, read it out loud and it becomes clear what isn’t working. Cut or refine sections to make the speech concise and succinct, and then rehearse away. The trick to oozing confidence and comfort when performing your speech on the day is to practise it enough times until it becomes natural. Don’t wing it! You’ll end up spending most of the time searching for word – the words you already spent enough time writing.

If you get nervous when public speaking, rehearsing as much as possible is a great way to combat a lot of these nerves – once you know the speech word for word, you have taken one big challenge out of the equation, and you can focus on delivery.

Tips to Write and Deliver a Great Wedding Speech

Giving a wedding speech can feel daunting, but with the right approach, it can be one of the highlights of the celebration. Keep these tips in mind to make sure your words land with heart and charm:

Keep it Short and Sweet

Three minutes is universally known as the sweet spot. Many do go over, but by the time you walk up, speak and hug the couple, you’ll hit about five minutes. This is just enough to be meaningful and keep the audience engaged without overstaying your welcome. Anything longer, and guests may lose focus (or start eyeing the dessert table).

Acknowledge Both Partners

It’s easy to fall into the trap of only talking about the person you’re closest to, but do remember, this day is about the couple. Highlight both individuals and why they’re such a perfect match to keep it inclusive and strengthen the overall message of love and celebration.

Add a Touch of Humour

A little levity goes a long way. A witty observation, a lighthearted moment or a playful nod to the wedding dress code or towards the couple’s quirks can help keep the audience engaged but keep it good-natured and tasteful.

…but, Avoid inside Jokes

What’s hilarious to your friend group might leave 100 wedding guests scratching their heads. Stick to stories and anecdotes that are accessible to everyone, which can be done by simply telling the story where the joke came from, keeping the couple at the centre of it all.

Speak from the Heart

Authenticity always wins, so even when you write a killer speech, don’t be afraid to go off script and speak authentically on the day. This sort of genuineness helps deliver a winning speech, so don’t worry about delivering a polished performance; rather, focus instead on sincerity.

The Final Word

For many of us, writing (and delivering) a wedding speech can evoke that special mix of anxiety and excitement. But, when done right, it’s so worth doing and being a part of the newlywed’s big day. At its core, the perfect speech is more about striking that golden balance of humour and heart than about turning the wedding venue into a stand-up comedy gig. Keep it short enough to leave guests wanting more, heartfelt enough to make tissues come out and funny enough to get the crowd smiling. Do that, and you’ll give the newlyweds a memory they’ll carry long after the last dance.

And if you’re looking for the kind of setting where great speeches, great food and great celebrations come together? Canvas House is the beautiful backdrop where memories are made, stories unfold, laughter lingers, and unforgettable weddings happen. Get in touch with our team today and let’s create a day worth toasting to.